Stop Asking Me if I’m Having A Good Time.


Do you ever attend a sporting event or live music where everyone around you shows boundless excitement for what’s going on? They’re yelling, cheering, dancing, and physically showing their enthusiasm.

I don’t know how else to explain it other than a genetic difference. I’m missing the gene that makes me join in.

I can go to a big name pop star concert and thoroughly enjoy the experience without feeling motivated enough to get on my feet and dance through the entire show like everyone around me. It’s also become common for musical theater productions to end with a big group dance-off and I’m never moved to join in.

I’m not a big sports guy. Never was. Living in Chicago with so many national teams is challenging. I’m in such a big time sports focused city and I could care less about it. 

I’ve always known I’m not a very competitive person and prefer solo physical activities as opposed to team sports. Maybe that explains my lack of interest in sports in general, but doesn’t really apply to other large group social events.

How many times have I heard “Aren’t you having a good time?” only because I wasn’t joining in on the group physicality and vocal participation. 

Before I knew better, I thought maybe my lack of interest in sports was a “gay” thing. I learned rather quickly it’s not a “gay” thing to not like sports. I’ve met many straight guys who don’t like them either.

Whatever the true reason, I’ve grown to be comfortable with myself and unapologetic when confronted by others about it. 

And I’m perfectly fine with that! Stop asking me if I’m having a good time.