Letting Go for More Energy Elsewhere

I spent the last few weeks crafting a small project based on what I perceived as a real need. I ran it past a few colleagues for input, revised my approach, and then launched a free pilot — opening it up to the first 10 people who applied. I promoted heavily and opened my calendar for scheduling.

One person applied. One.

I was disappointed. Honestly surprised, too. Maybe I was naive in thinking my idea was so good I’d fill those slots quickly. I’m still not sure. What I was sure of was that I’d get interest.

The pilot invited people who had been searching for a new job unsuccessfully for three or more months. I offered a highly customized 90-minute session that ended with deliverables — strategic options to consider and a 30-day plan to follow. Outside of that session, I’d easily spend another hour or two in prep and follow-up. None of it guaranteed a new job, but it did guarantee a shift in thinking: about the skills and experience you have to offer, and how to break free of job roles and titles that have fundamentally changed.

I carry some belief that what you put out into the universe attracts back to you. Some call it the law of attraction, others call it intuition — whatever the name, I think it might have been at play here.

Since leaving my corporate job, I’ve been genuinely excited to return to my creative roots. I spent years in tech always missing the hands-on experience of making things — with art supplies, with materials, with my hands. It was always a part of my life before, and I’ve wanted it back.

The timing of this pilot came from recent conversations and what I perceived as a real need. But it was going to take time to develop and test, and I spent several weeks on it — all the while quietly resentful that none of that time was going toward my creative work.

Did I subconsciously tell the universe I didn’t really want this? That what I actually wanted was to work on my art?

Maybe. Maybe not. It’s not like I did anything to sabotage my effort. It just didn’t attract the people I hoped it would.

What I know now is this: I wasn’t as passionate about this project as I am about getting back to my art. I knew that the whole time. But I’m still in that transition from corporate life to something freer, and I’ve been placing pressure on myself — for no real reason — to build a new income stream.

That pressure isn’t inherently wrong. But I think I’ll have more success focusing on what I actually want, on what drives me, rather than falling back on old corporate-minded thinking about what I should be doing.

As I move forward, I’m going to trust my gut more — and spend less energy on what I think I need to do.